1. Fixed Emotional Responses -

The stuck, holding ones are the most important to address. Find a point of fixed emotion, then dig into it with dialogue, incident clearing, un-fixing, polarity integration, soul retrieval, or whatever else is appropriate. The idea is to turn any fixed emotional reactions into dynamic emotional responses. The questions are simply to get started and activate something.


(Apathy is when conditions, actions, motivations, desires, etc., are regarded as "things" that are just part of the unchanging scenery. They need to be changed back into processes that are under the person's control, and that she has a power of choice about.)

"Tell me some things you don't really care about"
"What doesn't really matter in your life?"
"What is never going to change anyway?"
"Is there anything you can't do anything about?"
"What don't you even bother trying?"
"Is there anything you just aren't made for?"
"Is there anything that is hopeless to change?"


(Grief is about what is lost or isn't there. And really about a part of the person that she has alienated herself from. Get that part of her back.)

"What reminds you of what you've lost?"
"Tell me something sad"
"What is missing in your life?"
"Anything that should be there, but isn't?"


(Fear is of the unknown, one isn't looking. Transform into looking and learning.)

"What shouldn't happen?"
"What are you trying not to make happen?"
"Is there anything threatening you?"
"Is somebody after you?"
"Is anything hidden in your life?"
"What is your relation to the unknown?"
"What don't you want to look at?"
"Is any part of your life scary?"
"Is there anything you couldn't know?"

(Unexpressed) Resentment:

(Projecting mind reading. Resenting others for not accommodating what she wants, but hasn't said. Take responsibility for that and get communication going again.)

"What don't you agree with, but hasn't said?"
"What don't you like about somebody else?"
"What should somebody else not have done to you?"
"Is somebody else doing things differently than you want?"


(Hiding parts of oneself one hasn't taken responsibility for. Re-integrate them.)

"What are you ashamed of about yourself?"
"What do you wish you hadn't done?"
"What are you embarrassed about?"
"What about yourself are you trying to hide?"


"Who is responsible for the condition you are in?"
"Who or what do you blame for your life?"
"What parts of your life are others responsible for?"


(Something one should have done, but didn't. Putting the cause in the past instead of in the present. Shift attention and cause to present and future.)

"What should you never have done?"
"What part of the past is haunting you?"
"What do you wish you had done?"
"Tell me some mistakes you have made"


(Not recognizing the goodness in others, and particularly in herself. Really it is about a part of herself that she doesn't take responsibility for.)

"Who is an evil person?"
"Who would you let die if you wouldn't get punished for it?"
"Who would you enjoy hurting?"
"What do you feel like destroying?"
"Is there anything in your life that should be destroyed?"


"Who do you feel sorry for?"
"Who should you help?"
"Who can't manage by themselves?"


"What do you have no interest in?"
"Whose life do you have nothing to do with?"
"What aren't you going to bother changing?"

2. Emotion Modeling -

Find out how our client gets into different emotions. Mostly the resourceful ones that are of use to her. Start with the ones she already does occasionally and find out exactly how she gets into them. Like, what does she see, what does she hear, what does she feel, externally and internally, in what sequence. Don't accept that it is something that "just happens". There will be something that either triggers the emotions or there will be conditions that she feels are the right ones to have that emotion, and there will be specific ways that emotion is activated.

When you have worked through the ones she already does well to the point where she can activated them, pick some that she doesn't do well, but that other people do. Work out what would be a strategy for getting into such emotions.

Resourceful emotional states that can be used here are for example:

amusement, excited, daring, fascinated, stimulated, playful, committed, creative, proud, caring, appreciative, serene, trusting, peaceful, courageous, determined, glad, passionate, zany, alluring, zestful, loving, relaxed, interested, enthusiastic, provocative, ecstatic, centered, curious, energized, intimate, nurturing, compelling, sexy, sensual, clever, flirtatious, respectful, etc.

3. Emotion Exercises #

Exercise expressing a whole range of different emotions. A simple way of doing the exercise is to take spoken statements from any fictional book and say them with the designated emotional expression. Each emotion should be repeated until the facilitator is satisfied that the client has got it. Exercise negative emotions also. Use any list of emotions, but at least do ones like:

apathy, shame, grief, fear, resentment, anger, boredom, conservatism, friendly, curious, joyful, enthusiastic.

4. Emotional Blocks -

Use muscle testing to test the person's ability to freely express:

ecstasy, enthusiasm, joy, love, boredom, anger, resentment, fear

and any other emotions that she might have blocks on expressing. On anything that doesn't test positively, use any available technique to work on it. Dialogue about it, re-experience incidents, do polarity integration, etc. Or simply exercise the emotion, get her to do it and coach her to express it more fully.

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